"Before I Came To Truman" by Dayona Rucker

Before I came to Truman I was outside

doing dreadful things. 

At the time I didn't care 

cause I really ain’t have any responsibilities but 

to graduate but that was the last thing on my mind

as long as I was going to school. 

Everybody in my family called me Trouble. 

I was always starting problems with people and fighting for no reason. 

Cursing out my teachers etc. 

I was always close with my granny 

so I would skip school to go over to her house.

She would give me snacks and say it’s food on the stove. 

I made a plate and she asked me “why you’re not at school?”

I told her “I don’t like it because when I speak to people 

they think I'm always coming off as hostile.”

She talked to me and told me that:

“One day you will have to grow up 

because life is not what it is, it's what you make it. 

Even if you have problems with communication, 

Everybody is not living your life. 

They're going to move on 

while you're still back trying to get to where you need to be 

still having problems. 

Because you care about what people think.” 

I said “Right Right Right I'll Try to do better.’’

Nov 26 2020, came and she ended up passing away 4 months after 

me having my first child.

I was hurt.

I started to imagine how I have to get myself together, 

not just for her but for me too.  

I always pushed myself to get where I needed to be 

and it showed me that now my daughter depends on me 

to do what I need to do for her. 

I don't want her to grow up being mad at the world 

because I didn't make good choices. 

Dayona Rucker